sloth unleashed

(via ICE & FBI Hatch Ingenious Plan To Make DVD Piracy Warnings Longer | Techdirt)

Immigrations & Customs Enforcement, still beset on all sides by unflagging movie piracy, has decided to join forces with the FBI in their proven strategy of targeting every pirate’s one true weakness: legitimate customers who bought the DVD. Though the Bureau’s lengthy anti-piracy lectures preceding every movie have had limited impact to date, this exciting new partnership promises to inject them with new life by making them last way longer. It will also reinforce the weight of the warning by reminding viewers that ICE’s Homeland Security Investigations is also watching, not just those sissies in the FBI. In case that doesn’t get the message across, the joint FBI/ICE warning will be followed by a second warning from the National Intellectual Property Rights Coordination Center, which has a less ominous acronym but a much scarier logo:

…If you’re thinking “why the hell would they subject the only people who aren’t pirating films to this treatment?” then congratulations, you’re not ICE Director John Morton…